I am notorious for being a people watcher. (No, not a stalker, there is a fine line. I watch a variety of people as they go by. I don’t like to stay focused only on one person and EVERYTHING that they do.)
I like to watch people. I make up all these little scenarios in my head. I like to fill in their conversations and match their facial expressions with possible outcomes of situations (yes. I need to do something else with my english major mentality of needing the world to entertain me.)
I am a man of extremes. In my own head, I feel like I can go through days and days at a time, where no one at all is watching me. This sometimes affords me luxury of not having to deal with really awkward situations (no, mister gas station man, I don’t want to talk to you. I do have a single friend named Alicia who likes gas station boys though…)
*I’m in trouble for that one*
anyways. I know that’s not a good place to be in. A lot of times, I just look like I’m quite stand offish. The truth is that I’m quite the social person. I know that I hide it very well, by spending lots of time by myself. The dressing in black and wearing make-up, talking with a “woe-is-me” accent doesn’t do much to let people know that I’m not actually goth. (so goth, I was born black!)
I know that I’ve recently been very aware that I’ve tried to make myself into someone that some people would think is cool.
I used to be really cool on my own actually. I remember those days. I had so much fun.
Then I got involved with the wrong person. That was no good all around.
I’m declaring that i’m going to try to make a move back to being the person that I used to be (don’t worry, my blog entries will be just as ridiculous as ever. who knew people actually read these things…)
2 years later. it’s time to move on.